Hope

Anyone who knows me knows that I love The Lord of the Rings. But tonight when I was watching the Two Towers with my fantastic coworkers, something said by the insightful Samwise meant more to me than normal.

"It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something." 

Frodo then asks, "What are we holding on to, Sam?" to which Sam responds, "That there's something good in the world Mr. Frodo. And it's worth fighting for."

Our story is one that matters. Our lives are always full of darkness, and a lot of times, the only ending I can see is definitely not a happy ending. However, our times of shadow will pass. Bad happens in the world everyday to people I know and care for and even more to millions that I am not even aware of. How are we supposed to  press forward and be good people and raise a new generation of good people in this world of awfulness? Sam knew the answer. Find something to hold on to. See the good in the world and realize that the good does make this life worth living. Don't ever turn back. Keep going. So what we really need to do in this life is find something to hold on to. For me its family all the way, present and future. I love my family now so much and want them to be safe and happy. I want them to love and learn and grow together. And that is worth fighting for. I want my future home to be dedicated to living righteously so we can be happy. Which is absolutely worth fighting every day to become better myself for them. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is worth fighting for. Through the Atonement of Christ we are able to overcome all things. All sins, annoyances, weaknesses, hardships, and everything. Having Heavenly Father in my life helps me keep going. All these things and so much more help me see the good in the world. All around me I see friends and family and bishoprics and random people everywhere striving to become better people and to make a difference in the world for good. I mean, just look out your window and look at the miracles of nature that surround us, or at our own bodies that preform hundreds of millions of functions all the time. Somebody sure loves us a whole lot to give us all these amazing blessings. These things give me hope. In the hardest of times, stop and take a look at the good in the world and find something that is worth fighting for. Take heart, for "even darkness must pass." Don't quit. Things will work out so just be happy in the mean time and always, always have hope for something better.

Preparation

Sometimes in life we get that little "Aha" moment when we finally realize why things happened the way they did. When we think to ourselves, "Why, Heavenly Father really knows what's up." Well, I feel like I have had a lot of those recently. I realized that just about everything I have done in my life for the past year has been preparing me for my life right now. I suppose life is always like that, but it feels especially important right now. For instance, like most unmarried girls approaching the age of 21, I felt a lot of the whole, "well if you're not married, why not go on a mission?" thing. However, I knew that that just was not what I was supposed to do with my life at the moment and now I am so so glad that I am here, so close to my friends and family and I understand one of the reasons why I need to keep living life here not serving the Lord elsewhere. Also, I struggled a lot the past two semesters. And it always seemed like just the silliest things. I couldn't understand why I was feeling the way I was feeling. Fall semester, I was quite bluntly reminded of all the weaknesses I have and realized I have SO far to go in my life. And because I was humbled then I was able to really work on those weaknesses while remaining humble and trusting the Lord which is something I REALLY need to do right now. Then winter semester, I was just stuck in this rut for weeks and weeks and could not figure out why I wasn't happier and why I wasn't improving. (I know it sounds like I'm getting all Negative Nancy, but here comes the good part.) But I got a few blessings that completely turned around my perspective and gave me such amazing advice and insight on how my Heavenly Father views me as a person, which also taught me how He views all of us here which has been an amazing help in my life right now. Basically what I am trying to say is that we don't have any clue what is going on in our lives. We  could be living one way and then out of nowhere everything gets turned around in a way we never would have seen coming. BUT there are a few people who can see around those corners (or "just around the river bend" as my good friend Pocahontas would say) and those people are (of course) Heavenly Father and our Savior. They know what is coming up for us even when we have no idea and so why on earth do we even try to argue with what He has planned for us? Why do we try to rely on what we think is best and stress and worry ourselves to death about it?? Obviously, we have to make a plan for our lives and do our best but life becomes so much easier when we simply turn ourselves over to Him and trust that He will take care of us. Ask Him for help and rest easy knowing that if we continue to try to draw nearer to Him, he's going to prepare us for what is ahead. And a lot of times that preparation comes through other trials. I am so so grateful for all the trials I have had leading up to right now in my life and I know that (almost) the only reason I went through them at all was because Heavenly Father knew that I would need those lessons later on. And He knew that because I have a Savior who has already gone through that for me. And I know that if I put my trust in Him right now and look for lessons I can learn from this part of my life, someday I can look back and say the same thing about trials know. We are so lucky to have rough patches in our lives. :) Because we can do hard things! :)